Monday, March 30, 2009

the Good Old Days

I think I have this post in the back of my mind since a while an I needed a push to post it so I think I must thank Attawie for providing this push "Domo arigato Attawie chan" (yeah I'm in the mood for some Japanese... :)

it has been a while since I've noticed something which is that between every now and then all of us tend to look back and remember the good old days but frankly what good old days and were they really good?
the answer is that they probably not...! so why do we remember them and refer to them as the good old days although when they were our present days we used to think they suck big time and we just want the day to pass (and keep in mind I'm not talking about the good memories we had but rather the ordinary days) let's take an example here for the sake of clarity : as I started my job the job was mainly about studying and exams since I was a fresh engineer so we stayed till 3 am studying only to wake up at seven and go to work so it was really hard because your evaluation depends on your progress and I couldn't afford to mess up, anyway the point is as I now look back to these days I think "OH the good old days" although I was suffering in that period and just wanted everyday to just pass safely. That makes me wonder now if these days were good then what a shit whole is my life heading toward (forgive my french) and if every time I look back and think these were good days then that would only mean I'm heading downhill from bad to worst???!!!

and then another question pops up "was I happy then? and am I happy now" if I wasn't happy on that time then how would I remember these days as the good old days? and if I'm not happy now then how will I remember the present days in the future as the good old days? is my happiness now less than before? all these questions are so confusing yet they need to be answered.

after a while of having these confusing thoughts I've discovered something what I actually remember of these days was not the suffering or the tiredness but rather the sparkling moments I had with friends and co-workers and how I was vital, eager to learn and even afraid of the outcome since for me that was a good experience and even if it was not so good it is an experience. I'm happy to be able to endure it and I'm happy of the result. and as long as I haven't done anything to be ashamed of or hurt someone in the process. Since my is my life I live it how I want and there will definitely be some setbacks, sad moments and even a good deal of suffering yet I shall still live it, I shall learn from my mistakes, cherish the valuable moments and always keep in my mind the good old days and look forward to make my present days a good old days for my future and I hope that I'll always look back and let out a tender sigh and say "those were the good old days"....

may all your days be such a good old days if not don't keep sitting on your ass u have to make them... :)

P.S. I know the structure is week because I'm a bit busy and wrote this post in three days each day I wrote a part so u may see some inconsistency. thank u for your tolerance... :D